I was not sure what am I doing here. Its like going round and round and has no end. But still Im doing the same exact thing every single time, just to find my self in the same spot. Uncertain and confuse. Lost and not found.
In me, I have this huge hole which I can almost feel it in my physical chest since I woke up in that particular day. Man, was and still that hard the feelings are.
Well, let's have these fingers crossed and walk through life, step by step.
10 days later...
Step by step it is. And these steps went from baby steps to a thousand miles steps. This uncertainty led me to semi insane-spontaneity. Planning a sudden trip in order to have steps going on in my life. And there I went. To a place where age is not a limit and money is degrading.
I can sense fear strucked. Along with curiosity and hesitation. Fighting uncertainty with unsecurity. And believe it or not, I kinda like the result. Kinda enjoying this lost-in-purpose process. Just me and these foot steps.
Miles to miles and people after people. Finding good and bad at once. Literally finding sky above the sky. Digging the dirt to find a piece of gold in my life. Well, got lost is fun!!
And as I walk through this journey, between those steps I found myself again. In an old man cleaning the pedestrian path, I found a piece of me. In a little boy sit calmly facing the glass wall, I found another piece of me. Between those trees, I also found piece of me is sneaking. Suddenly, one in the mirror is not a stranger anymore.
He said I need a change, change would do me good. He is totally right.
I might going back to the same old routine, but this lost trip change a bit of me. And I do feel good. Still have fingers crossed, for more good.
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